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Joke of the Day
"What has 4 wheels and flies? A garbage truck! Ha ha!"
Next Joke
"ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking please keep your seatbelt on as we--OH MY GOD [plane flies into a giant baby mouth]"
"I just passed a beer truck on the highway. ""Wait a minute. I'm named after beer?!!?"" -My 6 yr old son, Miller"
"After an outage, what time does the power come back on? 12:00 --:-- 12:00 --:--"
"Apparently, women only enjoy a nice romantic breakfast in bed when they know how you got in their house."
"That'll do it! How do you kill a vegetarian vampire? You stab him with a steak to the heart."
"What did one plant say to the other plant that was annoying him? Please leaf me alone! Or I'll tell my mom, and you'll get in trouble."
"Married sex is a lot like Prison sex... The sex you're wanting, you're not getting. And the sex you're getting, you're not wanting."
"The new Linkin Park album"
"I now have 8 apps to communicate with the same people."