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Joke of the Day
"If someone writes you a long email that ends with ""Thoughts?"" just reply ""Nope."""
Next Joke
"What does Mark Wahlberg eat for breakfast? Funky Bunches of Oats"
"Sometimes when I'm feeling lonely, I write a letter to a prison inmate to tell them how much better my life is than theirs."
"For the past couple of years, I have been saying that the only holidays worth celebrating are the equinoxes and the solstices. I find all of the others to be astronomically unimportant."
"*draws a line in the sand* *looks at the line in the sand* *decides that it might be time to vacuum*"
"Q. ""Why does the Navy put Marines on board ships?"" A. ""Because sheep would be too obvious"""
"Wow, I wish people were into politics as much as they're into sports. *meets someone who's really into politics* Wow, I wish I was dead."
"What's the difference between boogers and broccoli? Kids don't eat broccoli."
"If I have an erection for more than 4 hours, she is going to need to see a doctor."
"Scientists have discovered... That left handed people are significantly more likely to finish exams than people with no hands."