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Joke of the Day

"New Immigration Policy Obama tells 5 million illegal immigrants: ""Come out of the shadows and register, or shovel out Ralph Wilson Stadium."""

"him: who is your fantasy? me: huh? him: who would you like to be stuck in an elevator with? me: the elevator repair man."

"I had a muslim only party Last night was a blast"

"It's time for my wife's 12 week sonogram! I can't wait to see what we'll have! A son or an abortion"

"i get in my bubble bath with clenched fists to make me look more manly"

"*rolls up sleeves* *gets high on sleeves*"

"Men statistically have larger brains than women, which is why men are usually smarter and elephants rule us all from their laser-hovercraft"

"Did you hear about that mexican murdering train driver? He had locomotives."

"Studies have shown horses exposed to marijuana are less stable and unsafe to ride. So get off your high horse."

"I don't know when but there was a moment in my life when food changed from friend to lover."