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Joke of the Day

"Studies have shown horses exposed to marijuana are less stable and unsafe to ride. So get off your high horse."

"What's the difference between a horse dick and a joke? You can't take a joke."

"Ronda Rousey is the only MMA fighter I can't fap to. She's the only one that finishes before I do."

"Sometimes I pretend my hoodie sleeves are elephant trunks. My vote counts just as much as yours"

"""I can't understand a word he says"" A: Meet my new born brother. B: Oh, he is so handsome! What's his name? A: I don't know. I can't understand a word he says."

"Why did god give women legs? Have you ever seen that trail a slug leaves behind?"

"What did the astronomer say when the government launched a napalm bomb to the seventh planet Uranus is on fire"

"It's been clinically proven that the most effective form of birth control I can use is: ""Just be myself."""

"Dad Joke Dad: (Grabs his chest) Call me an ambulance Son: You are........ an ambulance Dad: Proud of you son."

"there's a portal to another dimension underneath Zooey Deschanel's bangs and I am determined to use it to meet Benjamin Franklin"