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Joke of the Day

"Where do fish come from? Finland!"

"What do you call a place monks go for Halloween? A monascary"

"Joke of the year. /r/politics"

"Pretty sure California's water crisis could have been solved with the number of dropped ice cubes that I've lazily kicked under the fridge."

"hah woops!! someone asked me what's up, i tried to say ""not much"" and ""just chillin"" at the same time, accidentally said ""hitler was cool""!!"

"Don't ever talk to me in an elevator. It will just be uncomfortable. I don't want to be put in that position. With my hand over your mouth."

"Dont eat yourself A woman: She is eating dinner and she accidentally bites her lip. A man: Your not suppose to eat yourself. The woman: Well that's your job"

"Why should you not shop for plywood? You'll get bored."

"I have an EpiPen... My friend gave it to me as he was dying. It seemed very important to him that I have it."

"I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger, and then it hit me."