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Joke of the Day

"ARUGULA is my favorite vegetable whose name sounds like a car horn from the 50's."

"What did the duck say when he bought lipstick? ""Put it on my bill."""

"When are Latkes traditionally eaten? While hiding in an attic."

"I was gonna say a joke about the disabled, but... it was lame."

"Describing a female colleague to your GF, saying ""you know, the hot blond"" is conducive to sofa sleeping."

"A mathematician stumbles home drunk at 3 a.m. ...and his wife is livid. ""You SWORE that you'd be home by 11:45!"" ""No,"" slurs the mathematician... ""I said I'd be home by a quarter of 12."""

"Your brain has two sides: left and right. Your left brain has nothing right. Your right brain has nothing left."

"Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No Bell Prize."

"Everybody thinks I am a psychopath... but I don't care what they think."

"A guy goes to a record store to pick up a Meshuggah CD... but he can't because it's too heavy."