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Joke of the Day

"JOB INTERVIEWER: So what are your biggest weaknesses? HE-MAN: Well, I- *job interviewer's fake mustache falls off and it's Skeletor*"

"I was worried my circle jerk wouldn't go as planned... but in the end everyone came together."

"What's your New Year's resolution? Mines is still 1920x1080, unfortunately."

"My neighbor won't give me a straightforward answer, he's always beating around the bush. Every time I ask why he just says ""fuck you Gerald, it's my bush and I'll masturbate here if I want to"""

"What do you get when you squish a synagogue? Jews"

"Did you hear about the Jewish boy... ...that asked his father for $5? His dad replied with, ""FOUR DOLLARS?! What the hell do you need $3 for?!"""

"What do you call a love story between resistance and energy? Omhmeo and Jouleiet"

"What's the difference between Lance Armstrong and Hitler? Lance could finish a race"

"Just heard that distinct ""baby fell out of the crib and into a pizza that was on the floor"" sound"

"What kind of music can't Ed Sheeran play? Soul"