168229

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Lance Armstrong and Hitler? Lance could finish a race"

"What happens to a frog that parks illegally? He gets toad."

"Ladies: We leave the toilet seat up because we don't want to touch it any more than you do."

"I lost my laptop on the beach yesterday Now it's a dell, rolling in the deep"

"Woke up this morning and the alarm clock was laughing at me....then I realized it was upside down and the time was 7:07"

"So this guy is making a construction joke... But he's still working on it."

"What do you call it when...? What do you call it when you photograph childbirth? Child bornography."

"Q. What do they call pastors in Germany? A. German Shepherds."

"The election between Trump and Clinton was just like sex. You could've either take the ass hole or the cunt."

"Why are they called dive bars? Because they have pool"