42278
Joke of the Day
"What did the blind, innocent, sweet, paraplegic 7 year old boy get for his birthday? Cancer."
Next Joke
"Helen Keller walks into a bar... Then a table, then a chair."
"What did Batman say to Robin before they hop on the Batmobile? ""To the Batmobile!"""
"The knowledge that Jersey Shore is known as ""Macaroni Rascals"" in Japan may just be the most important of my lifetime."
"What do you do if an old man asks for a helping hand? He is meaning a hand job so run away!"
"When I say I'm gonna take a nap, it means I'm gonna go on my computer for three hours."
"Bought that new Mac Book Pro today. Apparently they crush up 100 Japanese children's retinas too make the display. Or something. I zone out."
"[turning off Shrek 2] well, i'd say that movie was shrekcellent! ""trent, 1 more shrek pun and i'm divorcing you."" oh karen, don't ogre-react"
"I assume guys who wear their phones on the hip do so because their pockets are stuffed to the brim with condoms and girls phone numbers"
"Never forget. Never forget that Americans can't even get the date the right way around. Sincerely the rest of the world on 9/11."