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Joke of the Day

"Why are you baking octopus? So I can get octopi."

"i asked ""where"" I work in a hospital. I once asked a confused patient if she had pain. She said yes. I said ""Where?"" She said, ""San Diego."""

"Tea without sugar isn't ""unsweetened tea"". It's. Just. Tea."

"Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead"

"Yesterday I saw an ad that said ""radio for sale, $1, volume stuck on full"" I thought, ""I can't turn that down"""

"A young woman rolled her eyes towards me, So I picked them up and rolled them back."

"The difference between Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee? Why does Chuck Norris have a lot of jokes but Bruce Lee doesn't? Because Bruce Lee is no joke..."

"I didn't want to walk in the woods. But i was forest"

"I successfully said ""Worcestershire sauce"" today!"

"Police officer asks driver if he recognizes himself. Police officer asks man if he recognizes himself. Then the driver pulls out mirror and says ''yes it is me''"