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Joke of the Day
"How long does a guest have to overstay before you can claim them on your taxes?"
Next Joke
"Do you think when the Hamburglar robs people he holds them at bun point?"
"She once called me bae so I had to baeurry her in my backyard.."
"[working in garage] ""Hand me a screwdriver, son"" A flat one? ""No"" [mixes vodka and Orange Crush] Here ya go"
"Billion dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell ""I'm just cooking!"""
"Why did the man cross the street when he saw the chicken foot? Because he suspected fowl play was afoot!"
"What instrument do Mexicans hate? The TRUMPet."
"This old lady in the grocery store was just giving me the weirdest looks and the worst piggy back ride of my life"
"If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it...... He's gay, definitely gay."
"Told my mom I hit 1200 Twitter followers. She pointed out how my brother owns a house and I'm wanted by several collection agencies. Oh ma!"