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Joke of the Day

"Told my mom I hit 1200 Twitter followers. She pointed out how my brother owns a house and I'm wanted by several collection agencies. Oh ma!"

"Guys, I'm getting a little offended by these racist jokes. I had a black friend. . . ... Until my dad sold him."

"What do you call a cat crossed with a canary? a cosh(x/a)"

"There's a chef that doesn't bother putting gloves on before prepping his food Now he's got a lot more thyme on his hands."

"Last night I dreamt I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone !"

"Why do black people have such big dicks? So they have something to play with on christmas. -inappropriate, but i think its funny."

"60 Second Lover I think my girlfriend has fucked sixty one people before me. She calls me her sixty second lover ...."

"Kids are like farts The only ones you can stand are your own."

"A pirate with a parrot on his shoulder was applying for a job. His resume spoke for itself."

"You are what your parents ate too..I'm part black licorice..part hot dog."