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Joke of the Day

"What type of rock is this Holmes? It's sedimentary my dear Watson!"

"Catch Pokemon? No thanks. I'm STD- Free."

"A survey recently revealed that 50% of people shit in the shower, do you know what the other 50% do? I didn't think so you filthy twat!"

"You're ""gluten free?"" How nice. I'm mostly ""money free"" so I can't be so fuckin' picky."

"Just finished a chat via text msg in which the girl finished every single sentence with ""lol"". It was draining lol. Wanna kill myself lol."

"Karen, if you can see this, the tupperware didn't come with the lasagna. The tupperware wasn't a gift"

"Yo mamma so fat.. That she drowns in the dead sea!"

"What music do dyslexic programmers listen to? Run/CMD"

"What's the difference between woman's breasts and a box of matches? The matches are made for adults, but kids constantly grab'em and play with them. The situation is quite opposite with breasts."

"My friend told me how electricity is measured and I was like Watt"