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Joke of the Day
"""Just Do It"" - Nike/Alcohol"
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"How many homeless guys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only 2, but I have no idea how you're gonna fit both of them inside a lightbulb."
"Q: Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces? A: From eating with forks."
"The Energizer Bunny stole the Morton's girl umbrella. It was assault with battery!"
"What is the one riddle that everyone gives up? The riddle of life!"
"I tried tricking an Inuit guy last night... ...but he was having Nunavut"
"Every now and then I see something that brings a little tear to my eye. Last night it was my wife wearing her strap on."
"Why do my eyes hurt? Because I got eye lashes."
"Why doesn't each pokemon have an additional poke ball? Testicular cancer"
"How many republicans does it take so screw in a light bulb? None, Obama's already screwed it for you. (Thanks, Obama)"