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Joke of the Day

"I got fired from the calendar factory... I guess I shouldn't have taken so many days off."

"If all the nations in the world are in the debt where did all the money go?"

"Two guys walk into a bar 3rd guy: ""You dummies never learn. Walk around."""

"The Mrs recognizes my ""tell"" when I've seen an attractive woman: my eyes pop 4 inches out of their sockets and I make a loud ""A-OOGA"" noise."

"What do you call a pair of nervous wigwams? Too tense."

"Are limericks still in? There once was a genie with a 10 foot wienie so he showed it to the woman next door she thought it was a snake so she hit it with a rake and now it is 5foot 4"

"A Freudian slip? That's where you think one thing but fuck your mother."

"To silence her critics who hail her as Satan, Hillary is set to launch a new post-apocalyptical video game after winning the election! It's called President Evil."

"""daddy why did the moon turn red?"" ""because god is flooding it with the blood of all the children who ask too many questions sweetie"""

"I AM IRON MAN! the real one...."