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Joke of the Day

"Fun tip - instead of going on vacation with a baby, stand outside until you're sunburned, then light $1,000 on fire."

"Someone bought Scrooge a clock for Christmas. He put it straight in the bank. Why did he do that? He was trying to save time!"

"Marriage Tip: If your husband is watching golf, show him you're interested by repeatedly asking ""why doesn't our lawn ever look that nice?"""

"Why do women like men who can work on cars? They know how to work under the hood!"

"The Vatican has dispelled rumors that the Pope is resigning because he's a pedophile. They claim he just got a little behind at work."

"two deer walk out of a gay bar one turns to the other and says ""man, I can't believe I blew thirty bucks in there."""

"ME: Velma cant see anything without her glasses, so in order to find her glasses, she needs to be wearing them PRIEST: Those are your vows?"

"What do you call a group of nit picky redditors? A headache."

"What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes down the chimney."

"So I decided to finally try one of those vegan stores It might have been the single most disappointing experience of my life they didn't have a single vegan for me to purchase"