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Joke of the Day

"You are stuck in a room with Adolf Hitler and Donald Trump. You have a gun with 2 bullets in it, what do you do? *Shoot myself twice*"

"What happened to Voldemort's face? Nobody nose."

"I love how the Ninja Turtles wear masks to hide their identity. It's not like you're a giant turtle or anything."

"When someone tells me they're a bodybuilder, I always ask ""Not the Dr. Frankenstein kind, right?"" because you can never be too careful."

"Best advice for men about women Never try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other."

"What cereal do impotent men eat? Nut-N Raisin Honey"

"""That's funny"" is a nice way of letting someone know it really wasn't."

"If you want to interrogate someone, do it in German You could say ""I love you and brought you flowers"" and I'd shit myself!"

"If you want to feel rich, just count the things you have that money can't buy."

"[Lady is being robbed] ""Help, Social Media Man!"" [Social Media Man swoops in & creates a facebook page called Mugging Is Bad]"