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Joke of the Day

"Taking calculus has made me want to become Prime Minister of a European country Then I can just throw money at problems instead of trying to integrate them."

"Why do chicken coups only have 2 doors? Because if they had 4 doors they would be chicken sedans."

"[two atoms side-to-side on a DNA chain] ""Hi."" ""Hi. U look familiar. Were u on A3564 before it went supernova?"" ""Yes."" ""U still owe me $20."""

"A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff... Ba dum tss!"

"I took a girl to Fight Club. Terrible place for a first date. We had nothing to talk about."

"People who like trance music are very persistent They don't techno for an answer."

"[liquor store] Him: Did you see a cat in here? I know I just heard purring. Me: *looking at huge boxed wine selection* Him: Oh, it's you."

"""Mah son's real smart!"" crowed the redneck mother to an acquaintance. ""He's only six but he can already spell his name backwards and forwards!"" ""What's his name?"" asked the friend. ""Bob."""

"What song to snakes like to sing ? Viva Aspana !"

"I just got a great deal on lots of digging equipment... It was hole-sale."