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Joke of the Day

"[Commercial for hobbies] Like drugs for people who don't do drugs. ""HOBBIES"""

"You never really realize how messed up your family is, until you start describing them to people that don't know them."

"TIFU by forgetting what current MMO my friend played and wasting my money to buy WoW gametime Wrong sub."

"No matter how hard you try to push that envelope It will still be stationery. ^edit: ^spelling..."

"What's Han Solo's favorite type of video game? First person shooter."

"So my friend and I were playing chess. I said ""why don't we make this interesting"" so we stopped playing. Credit - I can't remember which comedian I stole this off but i am sure reddit will know"

"I need to find out what my company needs to do in order to get protests by topless women."

"Why did it take so long for Americans to beat Germany in WW2? They weren't Russian."

"My 5-year-old refused to eat her dinner because Netflix was running slow. At least she picked a worthy cause for her hunger strike."

"What kind of tree would Hanna Montana be? A 'Miley Cyprus'. Dear god, shoot me."