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Joke of the Day

"What is Trump going to build to detain illegal Mexican immigrants if he becomes President? Juantanamo bay"

"Walk up to the finest girl in the club and whisper, ""excuse me, can I get at that outlet behind you hon?"""

"The final death of 2016.... Mariah Carey's live performance career"

"Did you hear about the plane full of anorexics that crashed? There were no FAT-alities, but everyone felt really, really dead."

"Whats a mans favorite word that starts with 'm' and ends in 'arriage'? A miscarriage! This joke never gets old, just like the baby!"

"What's green and bad for your eyes? An alligator."

"""I'd like to make a large cash deposit"" teller: ok, how much do you have? ""Wow can't a guy just share his dreams without being pressured?"""

"Say ""Literally"" and ""Legit"" a few more times in that sentence so I know it's literally legit"

"I've got the eye of the tiger, heart of a lion, and... a lifetime ban from the zoo."

"She invited me over for a romantic dinner and told me I was the dessert. I wanted ice cream."