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Joke of the Day

"I like to stare at a Priest & say ""You wore that same outfit last week"" so he thinks I go to church every week & knows I'm on to his shit."

"A Jewish kid asks his Jewish Dad for 50$... His dad says ""40$? What do you need 20$ for?"""

"I bet Dame Judi Dench has a pretty nice apartment. #cribs"

"Well, Jesus, now all Samsung's competitors have to say is ""we won't blow up in your pocket and set you ablaze!"""

"What do Reddit Users and Olive Oil have in common? They're both extra virgin."

"Where do you hide if you kill a black man? Behind a badge."

"Q: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? A: It has great food, but no atmosphere."

"If you can't beat the record, you can beat up its owner."

"My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207..."

"So, when does this adulthood thing start then?"