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Joke of the Day

"When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness."

"My girlfriend complained about my obsession with spices. So I said, ""Bae, leave."""

"Goodbye, Class! Hello, Trump."

"What person adds best in hot weather? A summer."

"Accidentally brushed my teeth with hemorrhoid cream ...but at least my asshole smells minty fresh"

"'If u insinuate that I'm fat again, I'm leaving you!' 'Don't be selfish, think about the baby.' 'What baby?' 'Oh, so you're not pregnant?'"

"Imagine you're about to have surgery and right before the anesthesia kicks in you notice a ""University of Phoenix"" degree on the wall"

"Stereotype Why do brown women wear red dots on their heads? - Because they record everything. (I swear I made it up n I'm brown too)"

"Why did the Console peasant cross the Road? To render the Building on the other Side"

"What do you call a quadriplegic in the ocean? Bob..."