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Joke of the Day

"I don't need a reason to enjoy a little wine. I just need a glass."

"Not all men are stupid... Some are still single."

"How do tacos fair in a war? They tend to be shells of their former selves"

"Anytime you see a young man open a car door for his girlfriend either the car is new or the girlfriend is."

"What do women and dog-poop have in common? The older they get, the easier they are to pick up."

"What would you call a democrat and republican coming together as one in the bible? A Bernie Bush"

"At least we know the people who killed the 5 cops in Texas weren't terrorists Because Muslims can't kill pigs. I'm going to hell"

"What did the gymnast and the grad student have in common? The both had an outstanding balance."

"if you're ever worried there's an intruder in your house, shout 69 down the stairs. if no one laughs, there's no one there"

"We've hired a new accountant. Her name is Helen Wait. Anyone expecting a check from us can go to Helen Wait."