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Joke of the Day

"If you're a Liverpool Fan you are currently doing one of these three things: 1) Defending Gerrard 2) Defending Suarez 3) Kissing your sister"

"What's a riot? Three dyslexics"

"What's black, wears a bandana and ends the world? Tupacalypse. (thanks to my buddy Mike)"

"Q: Why did the pacifist /b/tard try to calm everyone down? **A:** He did it for the *lullz*"

"Due to an unforeseen error during last night's love making session I am forced to wear non matching socks today"

"I feel bad for men with erectile disfunction, but they all seem to be handling it well. It's like all of them literally can't give a fuck."

"What did Carlos the fireman name his twin newborn sons? Jose and Hose B."

"I always rode clean. Always. Never won any bike races. Never competed. Don't even really know how to ride a bike. #vindicated"

"My love is like communism; everyone gets a share, and it's only good in theory."

"Instead of saying, ""YOLO"", try saying, ""Carpe Diem"". You won't sound like a douche andddd, you won't sound like a douche."