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Joke of the Day

"Why do Donald Trump's hands seem to act erratically and sometimes seem to stop where they are at the worst times? He suffers from low-handwidth..."

"Some people wake up in the morning & are all like ""omg I'm the luckiest person in the world"" and I wake up all like ""oh my god"""

"I think I'll test to see if my husband is checking my browser history by searching ""How to tell if your baby is black in the womb."""

"Two fish are in a tank One of them says: so you know how to drive this thing?"

"What's green and red and goes 100 mph? A frog in a blender."

"Is LSD illegal or just frowned upon? Asking for a giant purple rabbit."

"So my friend asked me if I wanted some Sodium Hypobromite... and I was like, NaBrO"

"""Sir how did you survive the snowmageddon?"" ""I stayed in"" ""Oh"""

"Have you ever flicked a cigarette out the window then five minutes later you start to smell something? So you turn around only to find your grandma fingering herself in the back seat."

"The Jewish Dad A Jewish kid asks his dad for $50. His dad replies ""$40?! What the hell do you need $30 for?!"""