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Joke of the Day

"Some people say Steve Jobs died to early... but I'd say its an appropriate metaphor for his companies policy on battery life"

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"Not much of a ""First Aid"" kit if it doesn't have peanut butter in it."
"What sound does a gay magician make when it disappears? Poof"
"My dog just ate a butterfly and probably saved Tokyo from a tidal wave. I don't understand science."
"Why doesn't Sherlock Holmes pay any income tax? Because he makes so many brilliant deductions."
"A junkie walks into a gay bar,..... he goes straight to the bathroom and starts banging ron."
"Relationships are like yard sales.... They look like fun from a couple yards away, but up close it's just a bunch of crap you don't need."
"Nobody wants to see your Ice Bucket Challenge video. Good talk."
"IKEA made headlines today... ...due to their new range of corduroy pillowcases"
"Why is the ocean so salty? Because the land never waves back"