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Joke of the Day
"I ran over some flowers when I was mowing today Whoopsy-daisy!"
Next Joke
"What's Hitler's least favorite planet? Jupiter"
"Apparently when your wife says ""let's make a baby,"" she doesn't mean assemble an infant from clay and chant The Old Words inside a pentagram"
"What's the difference between the US election and sex? During sex it's fun to choose between asshole and cunt."
"I saw a sign that said check your speed. Lucky I did, it had almost fallen out of my pocket."
"What is the difference between a 14 year old boy in the U.S. and one in Mexico? A 14 year old boy in the U.S. is a freshman and one in Mexico is a senor"
"1) Why did the nurse keep the bedpan in the refrigerator? Because when she kept it in the freezer it took too much skin off."
"Lets get freaky. I mean really Freaky. Like I can't look you in the eye for two days kinda freaky."
"What do you call a joke that is not funny? An unfunny joke"
"Marital prejudice/ politics amongst fruit Q: What did Mr & Mrs Rockmelon say to their daughter when she wanted to run off with Johnny Watermelon? A: But you cantaloupe!"