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Joke of the Day

"My gynecologist recognized me at the grocery store, so I guess I need to start wearing longer skirts."

"How do the Rolling Stones like their burgers? Plain - Rolling Stones gather no moss-tard!"

"What do you call a nose with no body? Nobody nose."

"I would lose weight, but I hate losing."

"My six year old lost a tooth. I left a note instead of money ""too dirty."" He has been brushing that one tooth all day. Lesson unlearned"

"What's a pirates favorite place to eat? Arrrrrrrrrbyyyyssss"

"Did you hear about the corduroy pillow? It's making head lines...."

"Where in the world can you find the highest concentration of Jews? The atmosphere."

"4-year-old: *puts on ballerina dress* *puts on ballerina shoes* *puts on ballerina tiara* Me: Who are you supposed to be? 4: A ninja."

"It's impossible to slowly tiptoe around without activating T-Rex arms."