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Joke of the Day

"Ugly scenes in centre of Leicester this evening An 'anti Trump' protestor threw a traffic cone, narrowly missing US President by 5802 miles"

"I'll tell you what I know about midgets and dwarves. Very little"

"How many Blondes does it take to bake chocolate chip cookies? 10....one to bake the cookies, and 9 to peel the M&Ms"

"Trivia: If you stood every single Starbucks employee around the equator... I would totally steal a white chocolate and raspberry muffin."

"Girlfriend's dad says this joke. Silly faggot, dicks are for chicks."

"We're having sweet potato fries with dinner ""Haha sweet potatoes?"" DON'T ""Don't what?"" You're gonna make a dumb potato pun ""I YAM NOT!"""

"It's official... My voice is incapable of making, ""Thanks. I appreciate that"" not sound sarcastic."

"-Give it to me straight doc. -You'll never walk again. -Now give it to me gay. -You'll never stroll merrily down the boardwalk again."

"How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. They are very efficient, and have no sense of humor."

"I used to have a friend who wanted to be run over by a steam train... When he finally was, he was chuffed to bits."