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Joke of the Day

"Do you like freezing to death and knocking down trees with your face? Well why not book a skiing holiday?"

"What's something that Slaves have and rich people want? Nothing!"

"I carry around a note in my wallet that says, ""The curse must be passed, I'm so sorry"" in case it's ever stolen."

"I really hope Al Gore was in a band during college And named it ""Algorithm"""

"""Superman's Dad"" is the last stop for an actor."

"What's the difference between a battery and a women? The Battery has a positive side."

"What's the difference between a psychologist and a groundskeeper? One you need for a rough patch, the other you need to patch your rough."

"She asked me for an example of a double entendre So I gave it to her."

"A vulture is boarding an airplane carrying two dead raccoons. The stewardess says, ""I'm sorry sir, there is only one carrion allowed per passenger."""

"""Well grandma,"" I said, ""this is where you will be staying eventually, do you like it? "" She shouted, ""Will you fuck off and let me visit your granddad's grave in peace!"""