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Joke of the Day
"What's brightly coloured and looks good on raver kids? Fire."
Next Joke
"Whats the difference between a prostitute and a bowling ball? You cant fit a prostitute in a bowling ball"
"My wife...she says I can be a jerk some times I think it's nice of her to give me permission like that."
"Jesus: *resurrected* Mary Magdalene: I have a boyfriend."
"So called ""Trader"" Joe's wouldn't let me pay with furs or rum or even live birds."
"If you ask me what my favorite rock band is and I'm being subjective, I'd say The Who. If I was being objective, I'd say it was The Whom."
"Probably the most notable thing about being an adult is not knowing whether you're tired or sad."
"What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab apple !"
"A man, a lawyer, a redneck, a nun, a blonde, a dog, and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, ""Is this some kind of a joke?"""
"TIFU by feeding my mogwai after midnight Whoops, wrong sub. By the way, if you see one, just throw it in the microwave for like 45 seconds."