52614
Joke of the Day
"Things will never get better until you make the conscious decision to lower your standards."
Next Joke
"""Why buy expensive fireworks when you can make your own with ordinary household chemicals?"" I said, and the other patients in the ER agreed."
"maybe bears omly like honey so much becuase their throats hurt from all the growlimg they do"
"Did you hear Jurassic World got shut down? Apparently they found a crisp rat in the kitchen!"
"Review of Black Holes: Zero Stars"
"what's orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot."
"If Cookie Monster was going to eat a country, what country would he eat? Viet-nom-nom-nom-nom"
"Boss: What's for lunch? Me: Food. B: What kind of food? M: The kind you eat. B: ... M: ... B: ... Me: You hired me. This is your fault."
"HR: Let's talk about why you were late today. Me: I told you! HR: DRAGONS AREN'T ""RELIABLE TRANSPORTATION!"" Me: Duh. That's why I was late."
"When I lose my glasses I become a horrible plumber because I can't see shit."