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Joke of the Day

"The 2016 US Presidential Election That's it. That's the entire fucking joke. Edit: Woke up to hundreds of messages and FP status. Damn. Thanks, folks! And thanks for the gold!"

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"Christmas Trees and The Pope Q: What do Christmas trees and The Pope have in common?? A: Their balls are for decoration only"
"They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian... Best joke of my career."
"I'm really worried Justin Timberlake is going to have me naked by the end of this song."
"""Hands up, don't shoot!"" cried the protester ""Take what you want, just don't kill me"" whimpered the store manager, dropping his gun and ending the terse standoff."
"Why does a milking stool only have three legs? The cow has the udder."
"A man gets a quote tattooed on his dick. He goes home to his wife who says, ""stop trying to put words in my mouth!"""
"Snoop Dogg; Shake what'cha momma gave you. Me; Ummm... ok. <vigorously shakes a frozen lasagna>"
"Do poodle owners realize they just bought a dog with a shitty 1980s white girl perm?"
"May he without sin cast the first stone [Everybody picks up rocks] Sharing Netflix passwords counts as sin [Everybody puts rocks back down]"
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