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Joke of the Day

"Sure, as a white man I can't say the n word... But I can say things like, ""thanks for the warning officer"" and ""hey dad""."

"Today I learned that wolves are not ticklish. Tomorrow I need to learn how to tie my shoes with one hand."

"What mouse was a Roman emperor ? Julius Cheeser !"

"The Wizard of Oz, synopsis. Transported to a surreal landscape, a young girl kills the first person she meets and then teams up with three strangers to kill again."

"What's the difference between a tire and 365 used rubbers? One is a Goodyear, and the other is a great year."

"I'm still disappointed that Penguin and Random House merged to become Penguin Random House and not the more hilarious Random Penguin House."

"What's the difference between inlaws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted."

"I own the world only talking dog... but he only talks about outer layers of trees."

"""This soup was so good I wish I could just...NOMCRNCHNCH"" *chewing glass* ""There must be a better way!"" -Inventing the bread bowl"

"How do you kill a one-legged fox? Tell it to run across canada ;) boom! Too soon?"