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Joke of the Day
"What do you do when a scientist dies? You barium! ba-dum-tss"
Next Joke
"If I'm found dead in the bathtub clutching a toaster, check for Pop-Tarts before jumping to conclusions."
"Losing my virginity was a lot like learning to ride my bike My dad was behind me the whole way."
"What does an aging Mafia boss do for his birthday? Forget about it."
"I'm often accused of being condescending. That means I talk down to people."
"Here's a FedEx joke http://imgur.com/UiGwU3e"
"I'll never rob a store because I don't want to see the police guess my weight on a wanted poster."
"I once raised a roof, and now that he's all grown up he never writes or calls."
"Wife: I'm going to grab some dinner, you want anything? Me: No thanks, I'm stuffed. Wife: Ok, I'm going to Taco... Me: I'll have 9 tacos."
"A dog is a man's best friend. Don't belive me? Put your wife in the trunk, put your dog in the trunk, wait a couple of hours. After open the trunk and looks who's happy to see you"