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Joke of the Day
"What is the difference between a gun and a feminist? A gun only has one trigger"
Next Joke
"Whoever made the almond-milk carton the exact same shape as the chicken-broth carton should have to eat this cereal."
"I'm stoned. Either the smoke alarm is beeping or the house is backing up."
"Energizer Bunny arrested. Charged with battery."
"For $60, this printer ink had better be hand squeezed out of endangered squids."
"Sorry you handed me your baby and I immediately put it in the garbage I thought that's what we were doing."
"Three old ladies are sitting on a park bench... A man wearing a long raincoat approaches, opens it and flashes them. Two of the ladies immediately have a stroke. The third couldn't reach."
"Here's my impression of an astronomer discovering that an asteroid is coming to destroy earth: ""This will make me famous but not for long"""
"If you get a tattoo of a thermos, Is it now a thermostat?"
"A lot of problems in the world would disappear if we talk TO EACH OTHER instead of about each other."