49426

Joke of the Day

"My favorite part about ordering a salad on the first date is going into the bathroom and eating 6 mini donuts."

"He paid me $150 for the ""girlfriend experience,"" so I went through his phone then locked myself in the bathroom, sobbing inconsolably."

"What do you call two men from Paraguay? Par a guays! "

"So, two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... *Ba dim tish!*"

"What do you get if your Kia is stolen in Finland? No Kia"

"What did Jesus say to the Mexicans? Don't do anything until I get back"

"What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in a bathtub? Throw in your laundry."

"3 years ago I trained 6 days a week & ran a 5K. Now I run my mouth 6 days a week telling the pizza delivery guy how I ran a 5K 3 years ago."

"How many mods does it take to switch a light bulb? [deleted]"

"Why were all the ships sinking Because the japanese just learned to fly and were looking for a fun target"