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Joke of the Day

"I just saw a gang fight. One gang claimed that grease is the word, and the other said that bird is the word. I think eight guys were killed."

"What happens when everyone in the country takes a pee at the same time? Urine-nation!"

"How are electric outlets punished? They're grounded."

"My dog is either dreaming or can't quite figure out how to shape shift."

"A duck was found dead on the sidewalk today... The autopsy revealed he overdosed on quack."

"""No pressure, but my happiness is totally dependent on you."" - soulmates"

"I have two tickets to the 2017 Superbowl, but I'm getting married that day so I can't go. If you're interested in going in my place, the wedding is at St. Peter's church and her name is Laura."

"I'll never forget my grandad's last words on his deathbed. He said: ""I should never have bought this deathbed. Asking for trouble..."""

"I'm not afraid to admit that I'm not the sharpest elevator in the sea."

"The Rolling Stones should have a reunion tour and call it Rolling Stones Gather No Mas"