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Joke of the Day

"Damn girl, you must be a moped Because I love riding you but I'd be extremely embarrassed if any of my friends saw me on you"

"What did the hammer say to the drill? You're too boring."

"I accidentally subscribed to the ""married man"" edition of Playboy. It's got the same centerfold every month."

"I hope Death is a woman That way, it will never come for me"

"Face it. Our planet is bipolar."

"What did the ghost say to the bees? Boo Bees"

"I feel pretty smart until I realize the wild ducks I'm surprised by on my neighbor's lawn are metal lawn ornaments he's had for 5 years."

"5-year-old: Can I borrow a dollar? Me: You don't have a job. How will you pay me back? 5: Me: 5: I'll borrow another dollar."

"What are some of the perks of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag's a big plus."

"Warning: Groaner. What could have caused the Titanic to both sink and not sink. A Hicenberg."