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Joke of the Day

"Face it. Our planet is bipolar."

"If you don't order beef for dinner... That's a missed steak."

"How soon is it going to be before school spelling tests only requires getting the first three letters correct until google does the rest."

"What did the deaf nymphomaniac say? come again?"

"What am i doing after taking lots of codeine? I literally ain't doin' shit..."

"How do you get Peekachu on a bus? You Pokemon"

"Did you know Avatar is a sequel to Titanic? It picks up where Titanic left off, in the sense that half the cast is blue and dying. Obligatory edit: Frontpage on /r/jokes! Wohooo!"

"Why is it so hot in a stadium after the game is over? Because all the fans left..."

"Guys, I figured out a better way to pretend you died mid-type! All you need to do is hold dooooooooooooooooooooooo"

"*Plots revenge by getting a job at a fast food restaurant and waiting for nemesis to drive thru and not putting a straw in their bag*"