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Joke of the Day

"In honour of Agatha Christie, turn off all the lights and kill one of your work colleagues."

"Me: Oh yeah, baby. Tie me up and put a blindfold on me...Grrrr. Him: Erm...I'm only here to rob the bank...and I have a boyfriend."

"What's Hitler's favorite part of a golf course? The bunker"

"How many tutors does it take to make a wild dog literate? It takes two to make a dingo write."

"Just tell me which one is wrong! The user ID or the password???"

"A palindrome walks into a bar, says 'Yasraba Otni Sklawem Ordnilapa'."

"Ugh Starbucks spelled my name right again and now I have nothing to Instagram."

"My girlfriend said she wants me to make her feel like shes the only girl in the world. So i'm gonna drop her off in the desert and leave"

"Your mommas so fat That when she posted to /r/gonewild they renamed the sub /r/earthporn"

"""If you want something badly enough you'll never give up."" -psychopaths"