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Joke of the Day

"Can't believe my daughter said I was embarrassing her by trying to be cool. She needs to check the tude & stop being so wiggity wiggity wack"

"Little Red Riding Hood is my favorite story about an idiot who can't tell the difference between a human and a wolf."

"People who say they ""Like to have fun""... No shit?"

"Truthful Tuesday: Sometimes I just say ""Hello"" back because there are too many witnesses around to stab you repeatedly in the face."

"Yo Mama so fat she gives herself group hugs!"

"2016 was so divisive. It just had too many factors."

"My wife said she wished she never woke up this morning. Turns out we do have something in common."

"Little Girl: mom, I want to be an alligator when I grow up Mom: well, pick one. You can't be...acghhghh! Stop eating me! Aghhghhh...ah..a...bleh."

"My girlfriend texted me ""helpmyspacebarbrokecanyoucomeoverandgivemeanalternative"" Anybody know what ""ternative"" means?"

"Did you hear about the psychic midget that escaped from jail last night? Yeah, there's a small medium at large!"