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Joke of the Day
"Kermit and Miss Piggy never married. He has Kermitment issues."
Next Joke
"Wanted to get a Ham sandwich, but ended up with a Cheese one by mistake. oops, wrong sub."
"If that was me in the movie Taken, my dad would have missed the call and emailed me 3 days later asking if I have a job yet"
"What do you call iron man and silver surfer when they work together? Alloys."
"How do you know the devil is white? Because he owns hell, he doesn't work for hell."
"Pretty sure my dog is even ashamed of me right now, and I've seen him do some questionable shit. Don't ask."
"[dog bites my arm off] owner: lol don't worry he's just playing"
"In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created man and rested. Then God created woman. Since then, neither God or man has rested."
"What's the difference between a Mexican and a computer? You only have to punch the information into a computer once."
"I'm gonna start a woman's monthly magazine called ""Period"", and some months I will send it out late to freak out subscribers"