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Joke of the Day

"If that was me in the movie Taken, my dad would have missed the call and emailed me 3 days later asking if I have a job yet"

"For this year's vacation, my wife wanted to go to a place that she has never been to I told her to try the kitchen. -Henny Youngman"

"Why did the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong socks today..."

"I'm on that new diet where you eat everything and hope for a miracle."

"Did you know it's impossible to piss your pants on purpose? It's a weird biological thing"

"Hey couples on Facebook that share an account, so which one of you got caught having an affair?"

"Watson returns from work one day... and finds Sherlock in bed with a very young girl. ""Christ, Sherlock! How old is this girl?"" ""Elementary, my dear Watson."""

"What do you call a bad circumcision? A rip off. (Da da tshhh)"

"How do you stop bacon from curling in the pan? Take away their little brooms!"

"Great to meet you too, person I'll never see again."