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Joke of the Day

"Good thing girls started uploading pictures next to a pool with the caption ""Summer is finally here!"" or we wouldn't have known it's summer."

"What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain"

"I told my dog to heel... So he went to the hospital and did all he could."

"Plan ""T"" is going to work out, I have a good feeling about this one."

"Well, today i had a brainfuck Guess i'm not a surgeon anymore"

"Legend of Tarzan 2: Tarzan meets other primates. He befriends them all. He teaches them to fight. It's a prequel to Planet of the Apes."

"I'm 39 years old and I still have no idea what I would do if a kangaroo entered my bedroom in the middle of the night."

"My wife's got that good at bonsai, we're having to move to a house with a smaller garden."

"Why are clothes so expensive? I shouldn't have to pay so much to not be naked. Other people should pay me not to be naked."

"What do you call the useless bit of skin at the end of a penis? A Man."