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Joke of the Day

"There are two types of people in this world: Those who need closure..."

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"How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely ? With it's sparrowchute !"
"What does an asylum have in common with a squirrel's house? They're both used to store nuts."
"What do you call a sudden fart? An institute."
"Why do traffic lights turn red? You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!"
"There's no I in team But there are quite a few of them in Multiple Personality Disorder"
"It's like my mother always told me, ""If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."" Then she said I looked fat."
"I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind."
"I hate it when candidates put signs on your lawn without even asking your permission. Who the hell is this 'Foreclosure' guy? And what is he running for?"
"What do you call a girl with a frog in her hair ? Lily !"