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Joke of the Day

"Thought it would be romantic to serenade this girl with some Elvis. I swear that's the last time I sing ""You ain't nothin but a hound dog"""

"A toothless budgie will always achieve his goals Because they always succeed"

"Why couldn't the lizard get it up? He had ereptile dysfunction."

"What do you call a cow that doesn't produce milk? anUDDER failure."

"Why can't you starve in a desert? Because of all the sand which is there."

"Yesterday I fell, landed on my back, and could not roll over and get up. At the time I was wearing a Turtleneck Sweater."

"My coworker has inspirational quotes up in her cubicle and one of them says ""choose your destiny"" so I guess she plays Mortal Kombat too."

"In space they just call it ""Jam"""

"Live each day like it's my last? Terrible advice. Do you really want to encourage me to eat my weight in cereal?"

"If opposites truly attract, the correct life strategy is to be a loser"