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Joke of the Day

"Speaking of lent some of you mofos owe me money"

"The inventor of the snooze button has passed away. His funeral will take place tomorrow at 8:00, 8:06, 8:11, 8:13, and 8:14."

"Remember the old times in the Internet? Where men are men, women are men, and the national security agents are young children."

"Carpentry isn't what Jesus Christ is most known for because he was bored with nails."

"I ate two pieces of string and they came out tyed together. I shit you knot."

"One could say that Brexit has been ... ... quite secessful."

"What do Pizzas and parents have in common? .. if they are black, you have nothing to eat!"

"What did one snowman say to the other? ""Weird...I smell carrots, too."""

"On the other hand, you have different fingers."

"Damn I hate this time of year I just get so damn Claustrophobic"