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Joke of the Day

"Everyone on here complains about ""the hivemind"" and ""circlejerk"" ruining the site I don't get it, it's not like it's Comcast or anything?"

"I ate some Girl Scout Cookies that were way past their expiration date... ...and ended up with a nasty bout of samoanella."

"What kind of porn does Smurfette make? Blue Cocky."

"Are you sure? Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One turns to the other and says, ""I think I've lost my electron."" The other asks, ""Are you sure?"" ""Yes,"" the first says, ""I'm positive."""

"Why did the chicken cross the rode? To get to the other side."

"As a child I was always taught there is a brain in my skull. Now I can't get it out of my head."

"Her: Make me a burrito, please. Me: ?? *wraps her in blanket *pours hot sauce inside"

"I think I'm allergic to mornings."

"Why was the lizard nervous in bed? He had reptile dysfuncton"

"What did Kris Kross tell the nervous paratrooper? ""Tell her you're a paratrooper. Chicks dig that kind of thing."""