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Joke of the Day

"I think Jennifer Aniston was filmed on a green screen in 2003 and it gets released with a different background and co-star twice a year."

"Wipe that smile off your face :"

"My math teacher thinks he is the mathsia... and that he has come to save us from our sines."

"Did you hear about the hydraulic press? It wasn't very impressive."

"Causes of childhood anxiety: 4% Bullying 9% Inability to puncture a Capri Sun pouch 87% Musical Chairs"

"People you mute should stay in your TL but with a piece of tape over their avatar mouth and their tweets all like ""Mmmp mm mmmph rf mph."""

"COMPUTER: HINT: name of best friend ME: Jen C: Jen sounds nice M: Wh-what? C: Is Jen single? M: Uh... C: Answer the question. Is Jen single?"

"If you're a grown man walkin around with a winter hat that has animal ears I can tell that @ some point people used 2 take your lunch money"

"How do you throw a party in space? You planet"

"it was hard being a teenager with the last name i mean stalk one guy and you're for the next three years"